I think I know whose property I’m creeping around on,
But he’s got more land than he knows what to do with –
His house is super far away from here,
So there’s no way he’ll catch me trespassing.
My horse is magical, and therefore capable of judging me
(I am NOT stoned, for real)!
It’s, like, sooo dark out right now, by the way.
Also, the snow’s really pretty.
I’m not done talking about my horse, though.
I swear he can sense that I’m nervous and–
Dude. I can hear the snow falling. Seriously.
I fucking love the woods.
I wish I could stay out here all night,
But I have to drive all the way out
To my ex-girlfriend’s new boyfriend’s house,
Just to pick up her stupid cat,
Because I’m a “such a nice guy.”
Goddammit.
